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Jokes and Funny's thread!

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Mod Kalaya

Mod Kalaya

Jagex Moderator Forum Profile Posts by user

Jokes and Funny's


Hey all,

Use this thread to share with us your best jokes, laughters and funny stories. We'll love to read through them on a rainy day!

Make us laugh! :D

Mod Kalaya |
Zarosian
Product Manager | @JagexKalaya

14-Nov-2014 10:17:37

Jokku23

Jokku23

Posts: 32,608Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Reserved for cool jokes, laughs and stories.

Starting with Minesweeper - The Movie. It's the funniest video I have ever seen.

Would be best if everyone just watched the video, but here are some funny parts from it.

WARNING! SPOILERS FROM THE VIDEO!











You are here because you're the best of the best. When I'm done with you, you'll be expert. You are here to sweep mines!

Each time you dig, you'll find a number. That number will tell you exactly how many mines are adjacent to your square. Find a one on a corner? It's a mine! Three on a wall? They're all mines!

Why are you really here? -I'm here to make this ledge safe!
Why are you here, soldier?? -I'm here because I'm bored!
Don't you ever forget that!

That timer is going to keep ticking until it reaches nine nine nine! -What happens then?
Nothing. You just suck!

What do we do now? Now - we guess!

Game over!!!
………. ,*˜*, ……. ,•°*•, … You'll … ,•*°•, …… ,*˜*, .………
„*˜……“• •“………'·,¸¸,‘•°. thank .°•',¸¸,·'……..“• •“……˜*„
……………………………………………………………………..
The Bible of Rimmington
“‹„¸¸„ •°`' · . ,¸¸, . · ‘ … me later … ' · . ,¸¸, . · '´°•„¸¸„›“

14-Nov-2014 13:13:57 - Last edited on 14-Nov-2014 13:30:13 by Jokku23

Miss Kizmo

Miss Kizmo

Posts: 4,375Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Knock, knock
who's there?
Cargo
Cargo who?
Cargo beep, beep!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Alpaca
Alpaca who?
Alpaca the bags, you pack the toothbrushes!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Handsome!
Handsome who?
Handsome pizza to me please.
Love & peace <3

14-Nov-2014 15:02:23

Amazonkaty
Aug Member 2006

Amazonkaty

Posts: 17,464Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
In a Friends Chat recently there was a ongoing range of entertainment regarding Llama's. So with that I'm going to share a few Llama jokes :).

What's more amazing than a talking llama?
A spelling bee.

What did the llama say to the blade of grass?
Nice knawing you.

What do you call a very fast llama?
A Llamagini

What do you get if you stand between two llamas?
Llamanated

~~~~~~~

Thank you for this thread Kalaya :)
'Every revolution begins with a spark'

The Journey of a Veteran Noob

14-Nov-2014 15:28:11 - Last edited on 14-Nov-2014 17:07:19 by Amazonkaty

Jokku23

Jokku23

Posts: 32,608Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
^That kind of jokes appear when knocking on the door of Varrock West Bank.

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
There's no need to cry!
………. ,*˜*, ……. ,•°*•, … You'll … ,•*°•, …… ,*˜*, .………
„*˜……“• •“………'·,¸¸,‘•°. thank .°•',¸¸,·'……..“• •“……˜*„
……………………………………………………………………..
The Bible of Rimmington
“‹„¸¸„ •°`' · . ,¸¸, . · ‘ … me later … ' · . ,¸¸, . · '´°•„¸¸„›“

14-Nov-2014 15:29:10

VVinh

VVinh

Posts: 7,372Rune Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Turkeys in Turkey and Hamburgers from Hamburg.

A haircutter has the power to force the tiara off of a priest.

The white queen just checked the black king if he had clothes on (in chess).

Bladeless knife without handle.

A murderer got murdered by another more professional murderer.

You are stepping on my foot. No, you are stepping on my sole.

I heard you like streams, so I put a stream of a stream in your stream so you can stream a stream of a stream while you stream your stream.
I'm gaÿ.

14-Nov-2014 16:35:41 - Last edited on 01-Dec-2014 17:05:53 by VVinh

Twillow
Aug
fmod Gold Premier Club Member
2005

Twillow

Forum Moderator Posts: 40,659Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
purple joke brought to you by...


What did the
green
grape say to the
purple
grape?

"BREATHE YOU GOOFBALL, BREATHE!"
We'll let you skip puzzles when you let us skip bosses. ~Foxxie

@Twillow_RS|| #teamblue|| #Purple4life

14-Nov-2014 16:47:15

Lady Deluxe

Lady Deluxe

Posts: 44,440Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Banananananananana

I thought I'd win the spelling bee
And get right to the top,
But I started to spell 'banana'
And I didn't know when to stop.

William Cole

The Ic(h)thyosaurus

There once was an Ic(h)thyosaurus,
Who lived when the earth was all porous
But he fainted with shame
When he first heard his name,
And departed long before us.

Isabel Frances Bellows

14-Nov-2014 19:22:18 - Last edited on 14-Nov-2014 19:27:25 by Lady Deluxe

Dracule
May Gold Premier Club Member 2017

Dracule

Posts: 7,457Rune Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Funny story #1

One that I will probably never forget. This was at a restaurant myself and some friends went to for my birthday, just over a year ago. (October 27th :p )

The place offered a buffet for a reasonably cheap price, so we had to go for that. It was self-service but the variety of food there was awesome. As me and my friend were putting foods on our plates, we passed the sauces table. My friend said "Oh, look Shai it's mint sauce!" Me, loving mint sauce simply had to go for it and got a ton of that stuff.

But little did I know, my friend had just tricked me - it was actually was***. So I went back to my seat, took a bite and cringed so much I think my forehead nearly touched my lips.

Friend 1: Did you actually get that stuff O_O I didn't think you'd believe me!
Me: I hae yu sho mush.
Friend 2: Wimps...it can't be that bad!
Friend 1: I wouldn't if I were you O_o
Me: Shtoppp!!
Friend 2: EWWW URGHGHGHGHGH *cough cough cough* WTH IS THIS ****??
Friend 3: Smells a bit weird too...*smells was*** close up and nearly passes out*

Yep, it was chaos. RIP the food that perished in that revolting stuff. I saved some of my food, just about but still couldn't bring myself to eat it. In the end we all agreed I should get another plate of food and leave the current one as a surprise for the unlucky waiter that picks it up.

Edit: apparently censor doesn't like was-abi either.
¸‹^¹´', ¸¸·¸·¸¸ ,'`¹^›¸
.
Dracule
.
¸‹^¹´', ¸¸·¸·¸¸ ,'`¹^›¸
' ´`· ˆ , -¸ . ¸- , ˆ ·´` '
………………..
' ´`· ˆ , -¸ . ¸- , ˆ ·´` '
'·ˆ·'
.………
I don't like steak
……….
'·ˆ·'

14-Nov-2014 21:29:51 - Last edited on 14-Nov-2014 21:34:05 by Dracule

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