|Navigation: RuneScape Wiki >> Scribbles & Sketches >> God Letters >> God Letters Issue 27|
|The God Letters were written for fun and the information contained in them is not to be considered canon unless otherwise mentioned.|
Saradomin, deity of duty and honour, shines forth his wisdom once more to banish confusion amongst those who call themselves his followers.
Topics of note in this edition of the letters include: pronunciation of the gods’ names, a possible haircut for Saradomin, the origins of Hazeel and the true story behind Bob the cat...
Greetings once again, my children!
I have recently been observing events upon these lands, and it seems a great evil is amassing its forces... I can only hope that you, my followers, have the bravery and wit to defend yourselves and your homelands and spread peace in my name through the chaos.
But let us not dwell on such disheartening matters, for this is not why I have returned to you. Let us instead look at what queries mine followers have sought response to this time!
|I apologize for pestering you with insignificant queries, but I was pondering how to pronounce each of the gods' names. My friend and I have conversed time and time again, striving to come to a logical answer. Here are my ideas, your names followed by pronunciation:|
|And my friend's (do not bother asking me how he got these):|
|*he claims the 'th' is silent, but where'd he get the 'ng' sound?|
|Please bestow upon me an answer to this query.|
|Another question. Why hath you made magic much harder to learn? For example, in the original RuneScape, casting wind strike gave you 22 magic experience!|
|But now, in this new, fantastic world where I imagined nothing could go wrong, casting wind strike only rewards you with 5.5 exp! Wouldst thou explain?|
|Strength through Wisdom,|
|P.S. Oh, and for those who want to speak in Ye Olde English, add 'eth' to just about every word. ^_^|
It matters not in particular how you mentally pronounce our names, for the deity of your choice will always know which of their missives are meant for them, but to answer your question with the closest possible pronunciations;
I hope I have brought you enlightenment through pronunciation.
As for your confusion over the learning rate of magic, magic now works slightly differently. Whereas before it was entirely possible to fail a spell and gain no experience for it at all, now you will find that should your spell fail to inflict damage, you will still learn from your mistake in casting and gain further knowledge in spellcasting (or 'experience' as it is known) regardless of your success or failure.
You are also no longer restricted from spellcasting for twenty seconds upon failure...
|I have done the Hazeel Cult Quest in Member's land. I wish to know the true origin of Hazeel and what he did to be locked up.|
|Also, if you had a combat level, what would it be? Have you ever thought of showing yourself to the players on Runescape. Please answer these questions to me and I will be forever grateful.|
Hazeel was one of those accursed creatures of the mahjarrat, cousins of the foul Zamorak, and was an evil warlord who dominated a region in the area now known as Ardougne with his unholy magics.
The valiant townsfolk of Ardougne managed to overthrow his oppression under the banner of the valiant ancestor of Cyril Carnillean, who was rewarded by the rest of the townsfolk with the property where the malignant Hazeel had once lived. Unfortunately, an evil such as Hazeel, and the rest of his mahjarrat ilk, is not so easy to kill as the townsfolk had believed, and it seems that his demise was not permanent.
As for my combat level, I would not have such a thing were I to deign this world with my presence once again, for my powers are not limited in such a way as a mortals may be.
Dear Great and Powerful Saradomin,
|I am an adventurer who often asks many questions of the people around me. Often, though, I have gone through many hours of pain and hardship because of a single lie that a player has told me. For instance, I was once told that there was no way to Ardougne from Karamja, and I tried many times to get through White Wolf Mountain and lost my life several times before I found I could get a ride from Brimhaven to Ardougne. Who should I ask to make sure they are not lying to me?|
|Your loyal follower,|
Why, you have found the most truthful source in this world already - myself!
Had you read some of my previous epistles, you would have discovered this handy little shortcut past the awe-inspiring white wolf mountain already, for I had spread this wisdom before, way back in the seventeenth edition of the letters!
Remember, my wisdom is glorious, but it is not often repeated...
Decipher this letter, it'll only take you a few seconds (end punctuation is incorrect mostly):
|Dp Dstsfp,om. ejsy fp upi fp s;; fsu pyjrt yjsm etoyr ;ryyrtdz/
Vpmdofrtomh yjr [pert upi jsbr ejsy fp upi fp pyjrt yjsm etoyr ;ryyrtd
smf ;ppl pbrt Timrdvs[r/ Upi mrbrt drr, yp nr svyis;;u fpomh smuyjomh
bodon;r/ Er mrbrt drr upi. mpt fp er drr smu rbrmyd yjsy [tpbr upi str
yjrtr/ Upi ,slr vjsmhrd upi dsu. niy s;; o drr str i[fsyrd ,sfr nu
Kshrc/ O epi;fm'y dsu yjsy esd upit fpomh sd upi rbrm mpyrf yjr, om
pmr ;ryyrt/ S;; O vsm yjoml pg od upi ;sxu stpimf d[rmfomh jpitd pg
esyvjomh yb smf ftomlomh nrrt/// Pj smf gpt pmvr [;rsdr fp mpy desu
pgg yjr dinkrvy/ Ejrm [rp[;r mpt,s;;u sdl upi yp fp dp upi fp dp
smuesud/ Yjod yo,r kidy smdert om pmr drmyrmvr ejsy upi fp/ :ody
gpt,sy od yjr rsdordy/ Fpm' frmu yjr gsvy yjsy upi desu pgg yjr yp[ov/
rbrm og upi nr;orbr dp kidy ohmptr yjod vp,,rmy/
Ah, another mortal who squanders their alloted time with myself with simple riddles...
To answer your question, my time is filled with watching benevolently over mine followers and using what small amounts of power I may put into play on this world in aiding the worthy in their prayers.
And the odd game of Runelink with Guthix.
|I have reancently been searching for different ways to teleport to the rune essence source but of late I have been unable to find more roughts except for the two beginning ones that are reviled to me during the rune mysteries quest. please respond with the cities where other roughts will be found. also a zombie attacked me just outside of the dwarven mining camp, what would that be about? please answer both of my inquires but more importantly the first one.|
|your humble and potential servant,|
The mages blessed with the knowledge of the oft-fabled rune essence are as follows:
Sedridor, head of the wizards tower
Aubrey, owner of the mages shop in Varrock
Brimstail, the gnome wizard
Distentor, the head of the Yanille magic guild
Wizard Cromperty, the experimental teleporter in Ardougne
There are others too, of course, but I may not reveal their names, for some wish to keep their ties to the wizards tower secret for their own reasons, and some I will not name, for the evil purpose which they have chosen to put their knowledge to.
As for the zombies, I have noticed of late that it has become slightly more risky to honour me in the burying of bones - I fear this is a malignant trick by the cursed Zamorak to sway people from my path, but it shall not work!
|Before I say anything more, I wish for you to know that I am not a follower of you. Yet nor am I a follower of Zanorak or Guthix. But that does not mean I do not believe in the legends or religions of Runescape, it is just that I choose not to follow any of them. I have a question in reference to some of the history of Runescape. In the writings of Solus Teppleton he mentions something of a war between Gods in the third age. I wish to know a few things actually. What was the cause of this great battle? How did it end? Was it just you, Zamorak, and Guthix that participated in this battle or were there other Gods? If there are other Gods who are they and what happened to them? Whether or not you choose to answer my request, I wish to thank you.|
Some things mortals are not meant to know, but do not consider the secret events surrounding the god wars to be a thing withheld from my followers through a lack of worthiness to possess such knowledge; I will not give you fuller details for your own protection. I will only answer in generalities, for words have power, and certain words when spoken are a dangerous power indeed. All of the deities currently in this realm, and some who now are no longer with us, were involved in the war. Each took a faction, whether their own, or choosing to side with one of the stronger factions, until the only factions left were mine own and those supporting the hateful Zamorak.
It was as things were building to a crescendo that the ancient guthix, who had been unknown to us previously, stepped in and banished our combat from the lands. Sadly this has meant many of the issues over which we fought remain unfulfilled, but I blame not guthix for his untimely intervention.
If he had not interfered in our squabbles it is likely this world would have been scarred beyond repair, and I wish not for innocence to be the casualty of our war.
Greetings o great and mighty god of Gielenor,
|I noticed that in your recent response to your followers' pleas, your Holiness seemed to drop several hints as to the future of the West. Is it true then that a westwardly expansion may occur or is this merely an undreamt dream?|
|On another point, why are you always ridiculing your brother Guthix? Does not he have a fair point on balance? For without balance, we would all topple into chaos and all would plunge into a great darkness, such as the Wilderness has.|
|Please answer this mortal|
|Strength through Wisdom, Balance is Power|
Evil must be destroyed in all of its forms, not mollycoddled and allowed to spread.
Should Guthix have his way, he would allow the evil Zamorakians free reign within my lands, spreading their forces like a cancer until they were ingrained so deeply, that to remove them would destroy the world.
I will never permit such an abomination to occur on these lands, for I cannot suffer such evil to live on. Only through purification can we cleanse this world of all evil, and live in the utopia which my order offers, yet foolish Guthix cannot see how my path is the only true way this world may flourish!
Dear oh mighty Saradomin!
|I am honoured to write to thee!|
|I have but one request, could you inquire to me about what exactly do Toy Horses do?|
|-Your loyal follower, Imhrhail|
What exactly do Toy Horses do?
Dear Almighty Saradomin,
|I worship you every day, dressed in holy monks robes, giving out Holy Symbols and even doing "Saradominist Parties", a creation of mine. Just please tell me seven things:|
|I am a historian too:
|Andrey111, a holy freedom fighter in the name of Saradomin|
U my lord saradomin i have been puzzeled for long. What truly happned to the god armydyal?
|Is it that he does not exist and never has or is he in a slumber as ur brother gutix was at one point.|
|Ur faithfull follower Zero Mavrick|
Armadyl is one of my noble brethren, although we differ on minor points and his interests lie elsewhere.
The last time I spoke to him, he was focussing primarily on the followers of Ikov and how best to assist them, but the theft of one of his artifacts has greatly damaged his reputation, although he is in fine physical health.
Dear Great Almighty Saradomin,
|I, an ant compared to you, have noticed that Thrander, the mighty smith, that was in the City of Varrock in the days of old, is now gone! I am saddened by this event, for he was the only person in the great world of Runescape, that you created, that could transform male armor into female armor, or vise versa.|
|Please explain to me, O Great One, why he is not where he should be?|
|Blessed be Your name,|
Thrandor has taken a well earned holiday to parts unknown, for he believed his services were no longer needed in Varrock, and issued his resignation to King Roald at short notice.
It seems there is some small desire to see his position filled once more though, so perhaps the council will be able to track him down and offer him his old job back, possibly with a pay rise and increased benefits package.
G'day ye fair god saradomin,
|I have atlast figured out the true identity of your psychopathical brother zamorak,his true name is zemouregal from the mahjarrat tribe,he came to Arrav in a dream and plotted the destruction of Varrok through Delrith which only saw the ends of silverlight.Is this true? please confirm this and stay pure always.|
Zemouregal is a creature no less evil than zamorak, who works in concert with him, yet the two are distinct.
Zamorak is the only Mahjarrat who has plagued my followers with the powers of a god, the others are but mortal. Incredibly evil, long lived and powerful mortals perhaps, but mortal none the less.
|My friend Psychopriest (of Letters 5 fame) and I were travelling near Camelot, when we encountered a creature named Bob. His name tag said he belongs to Jagex. Who is this mysterious Bob? Does he have a purpose? Is he a keeper of lost lore, a guardian of great treasure, a powerful mage in disguise? Does he lead adventurers to their destiny or their doom? Is he the bringer of glory or gory deaths? Or is he, as he appears, nothing more than a cat?|
|Yours, er, faithfully,|
|(Strength through Geekiness)|
It's just a cat...
You sir are a sham, and a fake.
|How do I know? I have SEEN your stats, that's right, you're in the top 500,000 just like the rest of us players, and you're not number one.|
|Not number two either.|
|Not three, or four, not even five.|
|You Mr- I made the world- Saradomin are not even in the top thousand.and your brothers don't even make the top 500,000.|
|So, time for some explanation I think, if you're listed then you must HAVE levels, so why so low? why could the elite players of runescape all beat you in a one on one fight?|
|and what about zamarok? the badass warrior who in't even in the top 500,000? or guthex, the most powerful creature in existence?|
Ah.... a popular misconception.
All gods of this realm have been bound by the treaty issued by Guthix not to directly interfere with the matters of mortals, nor to make our presence felt upon the land.
The being you speak of is not myself, it is rather one of your fellow citizens who has taken my name in honour of my glory - so too with the beings known as Guthix and Zamorak who appear not in the high scores, for they are followers who bored of honouring their deity before reaching level 30 in any skills...
All Powerful Zamorak,
|Why is it that there is no metal ore greater than iron found in the dwarf mine? I look, but there is nothing but iron ore, copper ore, and tin ore. Where are there more types of metal ore?|
|Your loyal follower,|
I suggest you look harder young miner, for I happen to know that both Mithril and Adamantite have their place within the Dwarven tunnels...
And so my time with you all draws to a close once again.
I leave you with the knowledge that should you have questions begging to be answered within your mind, and within your heart, then you may always turn to Saradomin, and let my wisdom shine upon you like the sun on a warm summer day. And so, until next time we meet,
Strength through wisdom,
DISCLAIMER: The views of Saradomin do not reflect the views of Jagex Ltd or its employees. We tried to stop him saying anything controversial, but he is a god.